This post is my thoughts on a lesson from the Beyond Freedom home study course for personal growth and life achievement. This course has been instrumental in transforming my life from stress-full to stress-FREE. Order your own copy today at: http://www.LibertyLeague.com/margieremmers And transform YOUR life from where you are now, to where you want to be. |
I've already shared some thoughts on the text of this lesson, now it's time to get down to the exercise.
1. What would you like to put in your past and keep there?
Wow. As I started writing this, something very powerful just came up for me in a way it never has before.
My whole life I have been trying to be perfect. In fact, I have often said that the purpose of my life is to avoid criticism--in every aspect of my life. Criticism absolutely cripples me--at least that's the way it used to be. My mother, in her loving guidance, corrected me in everything I did and said. After all, that's what mother's do--train their children up to be the best that they can be. I loved my mother (still do!), and so I did everything I could do to be perfect in every way. But no matter how hard I tried, she would always find another area where I could improve. I was never good enough. My brother eventually gave up trying to please her, but I never ever stopped trying.
To many, I did seem perfect. Adults loved me--I was a good kid. But kids thought I was a goody two-shoes--they didn't relate to me, and consequently I had few friends. That extended to adulthood, and it pained me deeply to continue to try and try and try to be perfect, and still not be invited to parties, happy hour after work, etc. People loved me at work--I was committed, I got stuff done, I constantly tried to improve. But after work, it was a different story. It's like I couldn't let my hair down, and so they didn't want to be around me. They couldn't relate.
People love people with faults--they can relate to them and don't feel guilty about their own lives when they are around them. I had been trying so hard to correct my faults, because I thought that's what I needed to do to be accepted. Actually, it was the other way around.
So, I guess if I could put one thing in my past and keep it there, it would have to be this need for perfection and this drive to avoid criticism.
I am working on letting my hair down, relaxing, and letting go. After all, my inability to do so has been a major factor in my stress!
Wow. My time is up already, and there are still 5 more parts to this exercise! This is why Beyond Freedom takes around 90 days to complete, even though there are only 29 Lessons. :o)