Lesson 21: Self Image

This post is my thoughts on a lesson from the Beyond Freedom home study course for personal growth and life achievement. This course has been instrumental in transforming my life from stress-full to stress-FREE. Order your own copy today at: http://www.LibertyLeague.com/margieremmers And transform YOUR life from where you are now, to where you want to be.

As always, today's Beyond Freedom lesson is a perfect reflection of what is going on in my life at the moment. (How do they do that?)

My 7 year old son struggles with skin rashes--a reaction, apparently, to things in his environment that he is sensitive or allergic to. We have seen multiple doctors and a dermatologist, we use only green household products (laundry detergent, etc.), and we have tried just about every type of ointment on the market, all to no avail.

We finally took him to an alternative medicine doctor (the one I mention in my book), who suggested that there were a number of things we could do with diet to help him.

So I decided (with the family's agreement), that the whole family was going to go on a clean food detox. That is, absolutely no junk and only the healthiest, freshest, most "alive" foods we could get.

I happened to have on my bookshelf Raw Food Life Force Energy by Natalia Rose that I had picked up at Border's for cheap. I had been reading it and thought that at some point it would be a fun experiment to try the 21 day detox plan that it includes.

Well, after the latest trip to the doctor, I realized the time was now.

The interesting thing about this program is that it's not just about eating and exercise--it's about your whole outlook on life and how you behave. Kind of like Beyond Freedom for your body!

The kids and I made journals on our first day to keep track of what we ate, how we liked it, and what we did. The author also provides "homework" each day, which are questions to write or think about.

The other day our homework was "Write down what you would do with your life if no one could criticize or praise you. How would you spend your time? Would you create something? If so, what? Would your life be very different? What does this tell you about how much power you give to other people? Just take a moment to explore this idea. You don't need to have all the answers. Being honest with yourself is the most important part of this exercise."

I wrote the following:

If I could do anything I wanted, I would spend half my time relaxing and enjoying sensual pleasures--the warm sun, the fresh air, a massage, a bike ride, a walk on the beach. The other half of the time I would be using my brain to figure out a solvable problem--pay bills, crunch numbers, work on a website. I would sing and dance whenever and wherever I wanted. I would be excited, happy, joyous, and enthusiastic about every moment of my life.

Then today I opened up my Beyond Freedom. Today's exercise is one of the most difficult in the whole program. In fact, I know many people who have skipped it--not done it or not done it completely because it is so hard.

It involves standing naked in front of a mirror and having a deep and powerful discussion with yourself--asking yourself a series of profound, thought-provoking questions.

One of the questions is "Are you the best possible person you can be?"

As I asked myself this question, my mind returned to my detox journal and my response to what I would choose to do if I were absolutely in control of my own life. I thought about how far I fall short of my own ideal for my life--how my excuses pile up--I'm too tired, I have too much to do, too much responsibility. And I thought about the author's question: "What does this tell you about how much power you give to other people?"

So I asked myself...

Why don't I relax and take time to enjoy the journey? Because I have too much to do. I have too many people relying on me--and I let them. I accept it. I volunteer. I say yes. I take it on.

Why don't I sing and dance wherever and whenever I want? Because other people will think I'm weird, my family will be embarrassed, I will be a social outcast, I will be lonely.

Why am I not excited, happy, joyous, and enthusiastic about every moment of my life? Because I'm too distracted by what I have to do to keep up with my life--to answer to other's people's requirements.

Yes, it's powerful to look and see how much other people control my life.

It was a deep and powerful exercise, and I can't say that I have all the answers. We humans are, after all, a collective group of people working together--and we do rely on each other to learn, grow, and become better people. And I have already agreed to take on my responsibilities. And most of them do, in fact, bring me great joy on some level.

So the answer cannot be to cut out everyone from my life and shirk my responsibilities in one fell swoop.

I suppose, like everything in life, the answer is balance.